“Mr. and Ms. Francor, it is time for you to place the heart into your daughter’s body” the nurse says looking at the new parents in front of her. Only twenty-two years old, barely adults. So young and hopeful, ready to bring their first child into this world. Ms. Francor, with shaking hands gently pulls out a small glass heart the size of a peach stone, clear and pure; there is not a single scratch or imperfection. “Wow, what a beautiful heart you have for her there. You must really love each other” the nurse comments conversationally, as they with joyful tears in their eyes places the perfect little heart into their daughter’s new-born body.
“Her name is Nadiya” Ms. Francor says looking down on her little child as the blood vessels attaches themselves and the heart begins to beat life into her. She knows that this beautiful little girl in her arms, is something special as she opens a set of beautiful sparkling yellow eyes and smiles.
“She is perfect and looks just like you honey, with her yellow eyes and purple skin” Mr. Francor says and kisses his wife. He couldn’t be happier right now.
Like Nadiya, every Vertocor receives a heart of glass from their parents, the day they are born. A heart formed from their parents love to each other and the live they give to their child. It’s said that the purer the heart is the purer is the love the parents share.
---
“We can’t afford to home-school her; we are barely getting by as it is. You are killing yourself at work trying to support us alone. I need to start working again” Ms. Francor says tired and annoyed. They have been having this conversation for a long time now. It was never the plan that she was going to stay home and take care of Nadiya full time but somewhere down the line it just happened.
“Can we not talk about this now? I am exhausted, I have just worked ten hours and I just want to go to bed. Besides, you know how I feel about Nadiya going to public school” Mr. Francor says, just as tired and annoyed. He has already worked forty hours this week and it is only Thursday.
“That is what I am talking about. You want us to home-school her, so we can always be around to protect her. But you are not around. You are never around anymore. You are working so much that you are barely seeing her. Every day she asks me where you are. Her heart is close to breaking every time I tell her that you are at work. Yesterday she even asked if you work so much because you don’t love her. Her heart is going to break one way or another. You can’t protect her from it, that is how life is; our hearts breaks and slowly turn into flesh. We can’t change that but we can change the reasons why her heart is breaking. We can still give her a somewhat normal childhood without her ending up resenting us” Ms. Francor snaps at her husband. She knows she’s just as much at fault as he is. They both kept going out of their way to protect Nadiya from experiencing her first heartbreak, to keep her heart perfect. It felt good to show off the perfect heart to all their friends and family and see the looks of jealousy on their faces. It was a proof of how strong and pure their love was. Whenever they had a fight or bad day, they could look at the perfect little heart and be reminded of their love. However, it would probably have been better if they had just let Nadiya have her heart broken. It would have saved them from a lot of stress and fights and missed opportunities.
“I have to work all the time! Do you think I want to miss out on her entire childhood? If I could, I would be here with you two all day but as you said we need the money” Mr. Francor snaps back. His voice has increased in volume, his heart is racing and he has started pacing.
Ms. Francor stops him and places her hand over his heart “I think you are using work as an excuse because you are afraid that if you stay home for too long you might turn into your dad. But honey you are not him. You are a good man and a loving dad. However, Nadiya won’t know that if you are never here with us”. With tears in his eyes, Mr. Francor places his head on her shoulder and lets her embrace him.
A couple of months later Nadiya is standing outside her new classroom with her parents. She is about to start her first day of school, not sure what it is, yet she is excited. She is going to be around other children just like her, she hasn’t met another child before.
A red skinned woman with green eyes opens the door and greets them. She has glasses, curly grey hair and is twice the size of Ms. Francor. Nadiya thinks she looks really friendly. “Hello, you must be Mr. and Ms. Francor and is this young lady Nadiya? I am Ms. Kleincor, the teacher. Come in and meet the others” she introduces herself.
“Honey, go meet the other children, while your mom and I talk with Ms. Kleincor” Mr. Francor says and lets go of her hand. Nadiya thinks he looks a little sad but she is very eager to make friends and turns away from her parents.
The classroom is full of children with their parents, all with different shades of purple or red skin, except for one girl in the back whose skin is green. Nadiya can’t take her eyes of all the different hearts she is seeing. Except for her own and her mother’s, she hasn’t seen any other heart before, not even her dad likes to show his heart. Excited, she runs around to meet all the other kids. Some with hearts that are slightly broken and cracked. Some with hearts that have started growing flesh. And some, like her parents, hide their hearts for no one to see.
“Nadiya, come here” Ms. Francor calls as the bell rings. Nadiya comes running, happy to tell her about the hearts she has seen. “Honey, your dad and I are leaving now but we will be back in a few hours to pick you up when school is over. Now be a good girl and listen to what Ms. Kleincor is teaching you”.
Nadiya looks confused at her parents she doesn’t really understand it. She thought they were going to be at school together. Her mom is always together with her. “Are you leaving?”
Mr. Francor hugs Nadiya, he looks even sadder than before “yes, honey but we will see you soon and we love you very much. Mom and dad are going to work now”.
“Have I been bad? I can be better. I don’t want you to go” Nadiya cries into her mother’s chest as she hugs her goodbye.
“No, you are a very good girl. This is just how school is” Ms. Francor says and wipes Nadiya’s tears away.
“Mom! Dad! Come back!” Nadiya cries as the door closes. She no longer wants to be in school, she wants to go home and be with her mom. She tries to open the door but it just won’t budge. She can hear some of the other children laughing at her and then it happens. It sounds like a window breaking as a large crack runs through her heart, almost splitting it in two.
“Calm down children” Ms. Kleincor says with her soft voice and picks Nadiya up from the floor and wipes her eyes “it’s okay honey. They will be back later but now is time for school. We will have a lot of fun and learn new things and you might even find a good friend. This here, is Ana, she will be your tablemate”. She sits Nadiya down beside a small purple skinned, mousy girl with shining green eyes. Ana’s heart is only a half heart with many cracks and a lot of flesh growing on it, but her smile is big and happy.
“Hi, I’m Ana, do you like horses? I love horses. Mommy says I can have a horse when I get older. Do you wanna be friends” Ana says, giving Nadiya a hug.
“I’m Nadiya” she sniffles “why is your heart only half? Does it hurt?”
“I don’t remember” Ana says and touches her heart. “Mommy says daddy did something bad, that made it crumble away and that is why we had to leave him so he can never do it again”.
“My mom says my heart was a symbol of how pure mom and dad’s love was but now I have broken it” Nadiya cries again thinking about how sad her parents are going to be, seeing her broken heart.
“My mommy says our hearts are made to be broken, it teaches us how to love. She says I don’t have to be sad about my broken heart” Ana says.
“Now children please quiet down. My name is Ms. Nana Kleincor and I will be your homeroom and English teacher for the next three years. Today we are going to get to know each other and tomorrow we will begin learning. So, one by one, I want you to stand up, tell us your name and your favourite animal. Let us start over here” Ms. Kleincor introduces and starts in the left front seat with a chubby, red skinned boy who stands up and introduces himself as Thor.
At the end of the last class, after spending the entire day drawing and making name plate with Ms. Kleincor, Nadiya finds her mother and father waiting for her out in the hallway. “Mom, Dad, this is Ana. She’s my friend” she proudly introduces Ana to her parents.
“Hello Ana, thanks for taking care of my daughter today” Ms. Francor greets and shakes her hand.
“Nice to meet you Ana…” Mr. Francor says but he doesn’t look happy, there are tears in his eyes. “Now Nadiya say goodbye to your friends. We have to get home now but you will see them again tomorrow”.
Nadiya hugs Ana goodbye and mom carries her to the car. She looks at her dad, who still looks sad. “Dad, I’m sorry I broke my heart. I didn’t mean to. It just happened” she says, hoping he isn’t too mad at her.
Mr. Francor stops to look at his daughter; he can see that she feels bad about it. “It’s okay honey, we all break our hearts now and then. It is not why I’m sad” he says and strokes her cheek.
“It’s not? Then why are you sad?” Nadiya asks confused, she has never seen him like this before and something about it makes her glass heart crack slowly.
“I will tell you about it when you are older” Mr. Francor smiles to her with a reassuring smile.
Happy that she isn’t the one making her dad sad, Nadiya changes subject “Ana only has half a heart. She said that her dad made it crumble and they had to leave him”.
“We saw honey. Promise us that you will always be her friend. She will need it” Ms. Francor says and grabs Mr. Francor’s hand with a loving smile.
“I promise mom. Ana and I will be friends forever”.
---
“First day as seniors and the last year of high school” Ana exclaims ecstatic as she and Nadiya walk down the crowded hallway to their lockers. They have been looking forward to the last year of high school for a long time and they are determined to make it a good year. Once it is over, they are off to college together and ready to start their lives as young women in Kroy Wen.
“Watch where you are going” they hear Thor threaten followed by the sound of someone getting pushed into the lockers.
Nadiya’s smile fades. The year has hardly begun and Thor and his goons are already bullying and acting like they own everything. “Unfortunately, something never changes. I was sure he and Chad would have dropped out by now. This year is going to be hard enough with the added stress and pressure of the final exams and college applications”.
“Hello girls!” A tall, beautiful girl in a dress that frames her heart with gold runs towards them. She, Ana and Nadiya are the only three between their peers, who still show their hearts freely. “Sorry I haven't been around all summer. I have spent most of my time in Sirap and Nalim. I got discovered as a model”.
“Oh my God Darla, you are back, we have missed you” Ana says and hugs their friend. Her head barely reaches her chest. “You are model now? That is fantastic. Do you any pictures?”
“A model. Imagine when we first met you in third grade you were shorter than Ana and now you are a tall, beautiful model” Nadiya greets. They have missed having Darla around this summer. Ever since they met in third grade, they have been inseparable. “Is it fun being a model?”
Darla laughs “it is amazing, hard work but amazing. You get to wear all these incredible clothes and you meet so many exciting people. You constantly have to work out and watch your figure but the places you go are so worth it. Also, they are going to pay for my education”. She turns the head of every boy that passes them in the hallway. “You have a new crack in your heart, did something happen this summer?” She points at Nadiya's heart that is still mostly made of glass.
“My parents are getting divorced, they told me at the start of the summer” Nadiya says softly. She doesn't really want to talk about it, it has been hard without her dad around and she misses him very much. She misses how he always had time for her even when he came home after a long day of work. Sometimes she would sit up until late night waiting for him, just to spend a little time together. Now he is all the way over in Kroy Wen and she is only going to see him about every third weekend. However, Darla is one of her best friends and she deserves to know. “My dad moved to Kroy Wen last month to start his new job in the Twin towers. They say that they still love each other but they have grown apart and their love is no longer enough to keep them together”.
“Oh babe, I'm so sorry. I wish I had been here with you” Darla gently hugs her.
The bell rings, calling everyone to the first classes of the new school year, for them it is math. The three friends walk together to an almost full classroom, there are three seats left in the back of the room.
Thor, who have grown tall and muscular, stands up and blocks their way, he smiles to Darla as he pushes a nerdy boy with frizzled hair and green skin out of the seat next to him “here Darla, I saved you a seat” he says and throws the boy’s belongings down to the back of the classroom. Darla gives her friends an awkward smile before sitting down at the table next to Thor.
Nadiya and Ana find their seats down in the back next to the nerdy boy, who begrudgingly is making himself comfortable. “We are sorry about that. Thor is an asshole. Are you okay?” Nadiya asks.
The boy lightens up a little at Nadiya’s friendliness “I’m fine. I’m Taial, I just moved here from Natsikap” he introduces himself. His English is very broken and it is clear that it’s not his first language.
Ana shakes his hand “hi I’m Ana and this is Nadiya. We are very sorry that this is your first experience of our school system. Unfortunately, not all here are developing good hearts. What is Natsikap like? Is it exotic?”
Taial gasps as he sees Ana’s heart, his own is hidden under his black clothes but they can hear it slowly crack. “I’m so sorry. You only have half a heart and you show it so freely. You are very brave”.
“Quiet down everybody. Welcome to Trigonometry, we have much to learn and very little time…”
“How did you like your first day in our school?” Ana asks Taial as she and Nadiya find him leaving for the day. After math, they had different schedules and they didn’t see him at lunch but they hope his day became better than it started.
“It was a little rough, thank you. Not many seem to like my kind around here” Taial says with clear hurt in his voice.
“That’s too bad; you seem like a nice and smart guy. If they just got to know you, they might see that we are all just Vertocors no matter if our skin is green, red or purple” Nadiya tries to cheer him up.
“It is very nice of you to say. May I ask you, I have been thinking about this all day, why do you show your hearts so openly for all to judge? You with a heart that has hardly been broken and you with a heart more broken than anyone should experience” Taial asks interested and compassionate.
“My heart crumbled when I was very little, I can’t even remember when and it was never my fault. It is part of who I am. No matter where I go or what I do, I can’t ever change it. However, I can show it. I can show the world that even with only half a heart, I am still going strong and I can still love. Hopefully, it will inspire others to keep going even when it gets hard” Ana smiles proudly.
Nadiya shrugs before answering “it’s just a heart, we all have them. They might change at different rates and look a little different but there is nothing to be ashamed of. I mean, if we were supposed to hide our hearts, they wouldn’t be so easy to see and touch”.
Taial nods pensively at their answers “where I come from, we only show our hearts to those we love. To show people the most fragile part of you is a very personal and deeply emotional gesture”.
“Hey girls wait up” Darla calls as she runs towards them. “Let’s go to the mall and hang out. We have a lot to catch up on” she suggests as she reaches them.
“Okay, let’s do that. You can come too Taial, then we can get to know each other a little better” Ana excitedly agrees.
Taial hesitates for a moment looking at the three girls in front of him “I don’t know. I should probably get home and start on my homework. I have to take school very seriously. My family needs me to get good grades and get into a good college, so I can provide for them”.
“Nonsense, you are coming with us. You have an entire year to do homework but it is going to be a long year if you don’t have friends” Ana grabs Taial by the arm.
Nadiya laughs jokingly “be careful, I met Ana on my first day of school too and now I’m stuck with her”.
“It’s settled then, my car is over here” Darla says and leads the way. She isn’t as excited about having Taial with them as Ana and Nadiya but she doesn’t want to be unfriendly. It’s not that she doesn’t like him; she just doesn’t know anything about him. “Be careful, I just bought it” she opens the door to a brand-new pink convertible. Taial and Ana get in the back and Nadiya sits in the front. Before driving Darla turns on the radio and pumps up the sound, catching the attention of many around them.
It is only a short drive before they pull into the mall's parking lot. It is crowded and busy, like normal. The mall is the most popular place in town to be, there are young people everywhere hanging out with their friends, smoking, skateboarding, talking and having fun. Darla has barely turned off the engine before she jumps out of the car and walks straight towards the main entrance. She is in a hurry and she is looking for someone. Nadiya is just about to ask what she is looking for, when Darla stops up and waves. There, standing to the left of the entrance near a trashcan is Chad, Thor's best friend, waving back to her with a cigarette in his hand.
Nadiya grabs Darla's hand just before she runs off “why is Chad here?” she asks, confused about when the two of them became friends. He has always been kind of a dick to everybody and three years ago, he started rumours about why Ana’s heart is only half. Besides, if Chad is here, then Thor is very likely not far away and she wanted this to be a good experience for Taial.
Darla just smiles to Nadiya “he asked me to meet him and I couldn't meet him without my girls. I think he likes me. How do I look?”
“He only likes you because you are a hot model now. Don't you remember how he treated us the last couple of years?” Nadiya says trying to make her understand that she is uncomfortable and would like it to be just the four of them.
“Relax, he has changed” Darla stops at a car to check her makeup in the mirror.
“I think I'm going home” Taial says as he sees Thor step outside to look for his friend. “Maybe we can hang out another time”.
“Sorry Darla but we are going with Taial. I also don't feel like hanging out with Thor and Chad” Ana apologizes; she was really looking forward to spending some time with her friend but not like this.
Darla places a hand over her heart as she turns around “if that's what you want then I'll see you tomorrow” she says. Her voice sounds a little off as she hugs them goodbye before she runs to Chad.
Ana and Nadiya feels bad for leaving Darla alone with Thor and Chad and they don’t understand why she would choose hanging out with them instead of her friends. They make a stop at a coffee shop before taking the bus home.
---
The first week of school went by in the blink of an eye; between the significantly harder classes, the endless amount of homework and their volunteer work at the hospital, they barely had time for anything else. Nadiya and Ana therefore welcomes the weekend with open arms and are on their way to a party on the beach. It’s not how they prefer to spend their Friday night but Darla really wants to go and they still feel bad about leaving her at the mall. Besides, they are seniors now, practically adults, and they deserve to let loose and be wild every now and then. Life is too boring to not build new experiences and have a good time. They have also decided to invite Taial, hoping it will help him fit in and get him a chance to find his people. They have been eating lunch with him this entire week but even though they like him and find him to be a cool guy, they have no shared interests or hobbies. They want him to have friends to share things with.
“Finally! You came” Darla throws herself onto her friends with a red cup in one hand and a cigarette in the other. She went down to the beach right after school with a group to prepare for the party. “We’re just about to light the fire”.
“I had some trouble picking something to wear. I could really have used the help of a fashion model” Nadiya jokes. In reality she was doing her math homework and forgot the time. If it hadn’t been for Ana coming by to pick her up, she might have missed it completely. “When did you start smoking?”
“I know you were doing your homework and if I had been there, you might not have gotten any of it done” Darla lovingly teases. “Let’s get something to drink… stop it” she squeals. Chad had snuck up behind her and started to tickle her.
“As if” Chad grunts, kisses her on the neck and takes the cigarette out of her hand. “Sup dudes, welcome to my party. How are you doing half heart?” he greets after taking a long drag on the cigarette.
Darla places her hand on Chad’s chest “please stop calling her that. It’s not very nice”.
“Oh, sorry dude didn’t think about that. Come let’s get something to drink” Chad apologizes indifferently and walks away with Darla in his hand.
Bewildered, Ana and Nadiya look at their friend and one of the school’s biggest bullies walk away hand in hand, as if they have been together for a long time. They barely get to react before someone yells and Thor, together with some of the others gathers, Chad runs to join them. Unsure whether they should stay or leave, Ana and Nadiya move closer to find out what is happening. Bart and Dale, two of Thor’s goons, are holding Taial down on his knees with arms stretched out.
“Why have you come to our party, nerd? We haven’t invited you” Thor says and punches Taial in the stomach to great approval from the crowd around them.
Ana runs in between Thor and Taial “stop it, I invited him. We didn’t know it was your party” she says hoping that Thor for once is going to listen to her. However, Thor, who is twice her size effortlessly, lifts her out of the way.
“Doesn’t matter half heart, he shouldn’t have come. He knows we don’t want his kind around” Chad says as he steps up to Taial and punches him in the face. “Green skins like him should just stay in their own shitty countries where they belong”.
Nadiya tries to push her way through this small crowd of guys and girls all taller and more muscular than she is. A couple of strong hands grabs her and holds back. Everybody is laughing as Chad and Thor take turns beating on Taial. “Stop it you dicks! he hasn’t done you anything”.
“What’s that Nadiya is your heart breaking for this dirty green skin? Are you a green skin lover? We better teach him to keep away from any of our girls” Thor kicks Taial repeatedly.
Struggling to get free Nadiya looks to Darla for help “Darla, please, do something. Please stop them” she begs but Darla is looking away in shame biting her finger.
Chad smiles as he turns to Darla “yeah Darla do something” he mocks. He grabs her by the shoulder and leads her into the centre of the circle for all to see her “so are you going to tell us to stop?”
Torn, Darla looks at her new boyfriend and then to her friends. There are tears in her eyes as her gaze shifts back and forth between them. Finally, she takes a deep breath and places her hand over her heart before she speaks “I… I think you should leave. It was a mistake inviting you” she says looking straight at Nadiya. Then she turns her attention back to Chad and in a much sweeter voice says “babe, I’m bored and cold. Let’s light the fire”.
Chad grabs Darla by the waist and pulls her closer to kiss her passionately. Thor gives Taial one last punch before Bart and Dale throws him down on the sand. They are all laughing at the beating he just got. The crowd follows the two bullies back to the bonfire, leaving them alone.
Ana runs to help Taial but he pushes her away. “Leave me alone” he spits as he with some troubles stands up and slowly walks away.
“How could they do this?” Ana cries looking at Taial limb his way in the sunset. She has heard stories about the things Thor and Chad have done but she never imagined it to be real, she never thought they would do something so horrible. “They are animals, all of them. Vile disgusting animal, cheering on Thor and Chad beating on an innocent, defenceless person. And Darla, she just stood there and let them do it”.
Nadiya helps her up from the sand as the music from the party starts blasting loudly. They should just have stayed home watching movies like they normally do. She doesn’t understand how people can do something like this and laugh about it. She doesn’t understand how Darla could take their side or why she was smoking. It’s like she’s a completely different person now. She takes one last look back at Darla before leaving, it hurts her inside to look at her friend and not recognise the girl she sees.
---
Since that day on the beach, time seems to drag by slowly and though it feels like they have already been back in school for several months, they are only halfway through the second week of September. They are no longer as excited for their last year. All the fun they thought they would have, have been ruined. Everywhere they go, they are forced to watch Darla hang out with Thor and Chad. At first, Darla sent them apologetic glances as if she wanted to reach out and make up, but now it is as if they never knew each other at all. She has changed a lot since she started dating Chad, she is bullying, smoking, skipping classes and she even met up to school drunk one time. Her grades have dropped and she has had more detention now than she had ever had before. It saddens Nadiya and Ana every time they see her and they don’t understand why she is acting this way. Taial has also been avoiding them; he takes large detours whenever he sees them in the hall and in class, he is sitting as far away from them as he can. It has been especially hard on Ana; she is no longer her usually cheerful and loving self, instead she has been grasped by sadness and her heart has formed patches of dark discolouration.
“My dad is visiting tonight; he is going to take me out to dinner. Do you want to come? You know he thinks of you as his second daughter and would love to have you there” Nadiya whispers, trying to cheer up Ana as the teacher bends down to help another student.
Ana smiles half-heartedly at the attempt “I would like that” but her smile fades quickly.
Suddenly, their principal’s voice sounds over the speaker system, interrupting the class. “This is your principal. Please turn to the news on your class’s television set”.
Never have their principal interrupted class before to tell them to watch the news. Confused, they all look to their teacher, who walks over to turn on the TV hanging in the corner of the room. A clip of the twin towers in Kroy Wen is showing as the news anchor talks “... just moments ago. A plane hit the twin towers of Kroy Wen. We don’t know what kind of plane yet but it is suspected that it was a passenger plane, possibly a 767. The plane hit the north tower near the 90th floor and as you can see, there is a large hole in the side where smoke is coming out. Reports are still coming in about what happened but we still don’t know whether it was an accident or something else. First responders are on their way and if you are near the towers, please evacuate the area…”
An eerie silence has fallen upon the classroom as everyone stares at the TV in disbelief, listening to the words of the news anchor. Nadiya feels weirdly out of breath and the world seems to be tilting ever so slowly. She wants to stand up and leave but her body doesn’t react. Her thoughts echo silently in her head. Unaware, she has grabbed Ana’s hand and is holding on tight.
“... I have just been informed that we have a call through from Mr. Rodrigo Salacor who is in the south tower. Mr. Salacor what do you see up there?”
“Hello, I am on the 80th floor of the south tower and I am looking right at the north tower. It is engulfed in smoke and there are flames. There are big red flames coming out of the hole. Oh no…” Mr. Salacor gasps and a moment of silence follows before he speaks again. “A guy just fell out of the tower… He fell out of the tower to the ground. We are safe here in the south tower but it is very scary. We have been told to stay where we are and that we are safe. Wait, someone is yelling… Someone is yelling about a plane… A plane is heading right for us!”
The phone call cuts out leaving the room in complete silence. Everyone is holding their breath as they watch a plane fly into the south tower. They cut to the news anchorwoman who sits frozen in her chair, trying to grasp what she just witnessed. Slowly as the realization of what happened dawns, the silence is broken by sound of glass shattering. The sound of the hearts breaking is almost deafening.
“A… a second plane…” the news anchorwoman begins as she composes herself “… has just hit the twin towers of Kroy Wen. The first hit the north tower about fifteen minutes ago and the second plane just hit the south tower. Reports are coming in that the planes have been hijacked. We still don’t know exactly what happened or why but we will continue to bring updates about the situation as we get them…”
With tears in her eyes, Nadiya finally manage to stand up. She almost trips over bags and tables as she shakily moves through the classroom and out in the hallway with Ana right behind her. Her heart is pounding violently and all she can hear is the blood rushing through her body. Two planes crashed into the twin towers and she just heard a man die. Her dad could be dying. She needs to find a telephone. The world is spinning around as she pushes her way through the chaos that is unfolding. Everyone, like her, is desperately trying to get in contact with their families. The few fortunate enough to have cell phones are already making calls while their friends are crowding around them hoping to be the next in line. Fights are breaking out between those shoving their way closer to the pay phones. Powerless, the teachers are trying to calm everybody down, while doing their best to hold it together themselves. Nadiya runs through hallway after hallway looking for a free phone. There is no time to stand in line and wait; she needs to call her dad now. If she can just call him, then he can tell her that he took the day off and that he is safe at home. They are going out eating tonight he has to be okay. She turns another corner and runs down yet another hallway and there at the end wall is an unoccupied phone. She drops in the quarters and with shaking fingers dial in his number. Ana stands by her side, looking at her, holding her breath. It feels like an eternity goes by between each ring on the phone but nobody answers. Maybe she put the number in wrong; she hangs up and tries again. Still, nobody answers. Desperate with tears in her eyes, she tries a third time but even as she puts in the number, she already knows he isn’t going to answer. For two minutes, she stands with the handset to her ear listening to the never-ending ringback tone, crying. Her dad has never missed a day of work, why would today be any different.
---
Nadiya is lying on the couch swaddled in blankets, crying. She has been lying there for the last two weeks. She hasn’t felt like doing anything other than wait by the phone, hoping to hear it ring. It all has changed her heart significantly; half of her heart has now completely turned into flesh while the other half has splintered into thousands of small pieces. She doesn’t know how she would have gone through the last two weeks without her mother at her side. Yet she is so angry with her that it hurts. She doesn’t want to be but she can’t stop feeling that her dad could be alive if it wasn’t for her. “Mom, why did you and dad get divorced? If you hadn’t, he would still be here with us and he wouldn’t have been in Kroy Wen” she finally manages to ask the question that has been running through her mind.
Ms. Francor has been doing her best to take care of them and keep herself going. She is scared that if she let herself breakdown and feel all the pain and sorrow she might not come back up again and her daughter needs her. She takes a breath and sits down on the couch. For a moment, she just looks lovingly at her daughter without saying a word. “Your dad and I loved each other very much; you are proof of that. But we were so young and our fears and insecurities were slowly pulling us apart” she finally says and takes Nadiya’s hand in hers. “Do you remember when you were little, how your dad was always at work? It wasn’t because he really liked working or because he didn’t want to be home with us. No, your dad was scared that if he stayed home for too long, he would turn into his own dad. You don’t know this about him but your dad only has a half heart. Your grandma died the day your dad was born and your granddad blamed him for it. Every day, your granddad would beat your dad to punish him for the loss of your grandma. Eventually, when your dad was fourteen, he had had enough and he ran away from home and never returned. He swore to never become like his dad and he tried his best every day but he could always feel the anger burning inside him. On the day you were born he saw you lying there completely pure and innocent with the most perfect heart to exist and it terrified him. It terrified him thinking about all the things people could do to you, what he was able to do. All he wanted was to keep you safe. We did our best to protect you and keep your heart perfect for as long as we could because it was proof that you were okay. We changed our lives trying to prevent the inevitable. I quit my job to stay home full time and keep an eye on you. Your dad kept working more and more to provide for us and give you everything you needed. But it is difficult to raise a child, especially when you stress and panic about every little thing. When we finally learned to let go and trust that you would be safe in a normal life, it was too late, the scars in our relationship had grown too deep. We tried to stay together and rekindle the love that we shared. We did everything we could but, in the end, it wasn’t enough. We had changed too much. We knew it was too late when I, in the start of this year, got pregnant again and we saw the heart that was growing in me; it was rough, scratched up and broken. The heart didn’t survive and we agreed that our marriage was over. We didn’t split up out of hate or anything like that; we did it out of love for you. Your dad accepted a job in Kroy Wen to earn money for your future and because he knew, you and Ana were planning on moving there after high school”.
“I didn’t know. I’m sorry mom” Nadiya says and hugs her mom. They have been suffering so much for her, without ever letting her know. “Do you think he made it out?”
“Sorry honey, I don’t think so. Knowing your dad, he would have stayed behind to help as many as he could” Ms. Francor wishes she could say anything to make it better but she knows the truth in her heart. “Now, go get dressed. You are going back to school today and Ana is going to be here very soon”.
Reluctant, Nadiya gets up and drags herself into her room. She doesn’t feel like going to school but they were only given two weeks free to mourn. She can hear her mom turn on the TV; they have been watching the news a lot lately.
“... the latest reports about the attack on the twin towers states that the hijackers all were a part of the same Muscor extremist group. The group’s leader, Cal Halcor, has released a statement, claiming the attack is only the first step in their plans to bring down our western societies. Autopsy shows that the hearts of all nineteen hijackers had turned to stone many months before the attack…”
Ana takes a moment to wipe her eyes and plaster on a smile before she knocks on the door and enters. Her mom, Ms. Jamescor, has just dropped her off on her way to work at the hospital. The last two weeks haven’t been easy for her. Seeing Nadiya in all that pain every day and not being able to help has been breaking her heart and the dark patches have grown bigger, it is almost black now. Still Nadiya was the only reason she even left her bed. She hasn’t said it, but she also misses Mr. Francor very much. He was the closest thing she had to a dad herself; he was always there to help or listen. However, he wasn’t her real dad and she doesn’t feel like she can let Nadiya know how much she is hurting. Nadiya has never minded sharing her dad with her but she feels like she is taking the attention away from her and she feels like she has to right to mourn him like she does. “Nadiya, are you ready?” she calls as she closes the front door behind her “hi Ms. Francor”.
Nadiya emerges from her room wearing a comfortable hoodie and sweatpants. She doesn’t feel like wearing her usual clothing, not right now. “I’m ready”. She hugs Ana and grabs her bag, ready to go. She wants to suggest that they just skip school and go somewhere else. Just anywhere away from everything and stay there alone, but she doesn’t. Her dad would have wanted them to go back to school and get their education. “Bye mom”.
They aren’t saying much to each other on their way to school. Their words can’t express their feelings right now. They are just sitting close on the bus, holding hands, taking comfort in each other. At a red light, they see Chad drive up on their side in his cabriolet with a distant and almost sad expression in his eyes. A girl, who isn’t Darla, is leaning against him, kissing him on the neck. It isn’t the first time he has been seen with other girls and it pisses them off to see him cheat on their friend. They want to tell her about it, hoping that it could bring her back to them but they can’t tell her. Last time she flipped out and the other girl ended up with a broken nose. The light turns green and they drive away, leaving the bus behind. As they arrive to school, it feels oddly hollow. A small alter has been raised in the rotunda with pictures, candles and colourful flowers as a monument to the victims. Before, students would be hanging around in the hallways at their lockers, talking or they would stand outside near the stairs, smoking and having a good time, but now it all just feels abandoned like a forgotten black and white picture. Their fellow schoolmates walk aimlessly around with bleak expressions of despair in their eyes, as if they don’t know what they are doing back here or how they are supposed return to the life they had before.
They find Chad alone, looking at the altar. He turns to stops them while he dries his eyes “Darla says your dad was working in the towers. My sister was working there too. I haven’t heard from her and was wondering if you had heard from your dad?” his voice quivers slightly as he asks. If it had been any other guy, they would have felt compassion and pity for him. However, when they look at him, they only see the guy who laughingly beat up an innocent man on the beach.
Nadiya shakes her head slowly “no, I haven’t heard anything yet. I don’t know if he was at work or somewhere else” the words are hard to say.
Chad sighs deep and his head drops low “if you hear anything would you give me a call. My sister is my best friend; she just started working in the towers a month ago. I can’t lose her” he says before leaving. They haven’t heard him be this vulnerable since camp in third grade where he forgot his teddy at home.
Chad has barely left before Darla storms towards them, angry “why did you talk to Chad? Are you trying to get with my man?” she almost yells. She looks thinner and more exhausted than ever, like she hasn’t been eating for some time.
“What? No, he was asking about my dad. I’m not interested in Chad” Nadiya raises her hands defensively and steps backwards. She would never do something like this to Darla and it hurts that she would think that.
“You better not. Stay away from Chad or I will ruin you” Darla threatens and leaves the same way Chad went.
---
After a month, life at school has almost returned to normal. Most students have returned and those not directly affected by the attack on the twin towers seem to have almost forgotten. Only the growing hatred towards the immigrant student seems to linger. Especially Thor and Chad have been adamant on getting revenge on them, to avenge his sister. The sound of someone thrown across the lockers echoes through the hallway. Nadiya and Ana know exactly what this means and run to help. Just as expected, they find Thor and Chad standing over Taial. They beat him up quite often now, almost daily. Unfortunately, no matter how many times Ana and Nadiya reports them, they manage to avoid getting caught; they are always gone when the teachers finally arrive and no one dares to witness against them. They hate to see Taial and the others getting beaten because of their skin colour and they do their best to help them out. Yet Taial still refuses their friendship. He hasn’t spoken to them since the day on the beach.
“Yo, Muscor scum, didn’t we tell you not to come around here anymore” Thor and Chad yells as they kick and spit on Taial.
“I’m not Muscor. I’m from Natsikap but I was raised Cricor like all of you” Taial futilely explains as he defensively holds his arms over his head.
Ana runs in between them “stop it you jerks”. She is tired of Thor and Chad getting away with violence. Tired of seeing and hearing people get beaten without anyone standing up for them.
Thor pushes Ana to the side “move it half heart, he’s only getting what he deserves”.
“No, he had nothing to do with the attacks. He is innocent” Nadiya defends Taial and tries to push Chad away but his size makes it impossible.
“How can you say that? It’s his people that killed your dad and my sister” Chad yells in pain.
"He's from another country you ignorant douche and you can't condemn an entire culture or religion by the actions of some extremist" Nadiya yells back. Her dad would not have wanted anyone to suffer in his name and she will not let anyone defile his memory with violence.
The fight has drawn a lot of attention and a large crowd has gathered around them, curious about what is happening. Many are even loudly agreeing with Thor and Chad. It frightens Ana and Nadiya how many are willing to see Taial get beaten up and how few are standing up to defend him. Even his friends Jaamil and Thet, who are also victims of Thor and Chad's hatred, are standing in the crowd doing nothing.
“Bart, Dale, get them out of the way” Thor commands and Ana and Nadiya are forcefully moved out of the way. Thor grabs Taial and pulls him up from the ground, just to throw him against a locker and punch him in the face.
“What is going on here? Get out of the way” principal Pat Martincor is forcing his way through the crowd to see what is happening. “You two! I have gotten plenty of complaints about you the entire year and now I finally caught you in the act. Thor, Chad you are both expelled for a month. In addition, everybody else here has detention for a week. Standing around watching one of your schoolmates get beaten up. You should be ashamed of yourself. School should be a safe place for education and nobody should fear getting beaten up just by being here” he yells and scolds. The crowd immediately disperses as he threatens them with detention.
Nadiya doesn’t mind if she gets detention for this, she’s just happy that it has stopped and that Thor and Chad will be gone for the next month. Taial has grabbed his things and walked away before she even got the chance to talk to him.
---
Winter slowly crept in over the country, covering everything in a thick layer of snow. The lake and beach are frozen and several roads are blocked. This year it feels a lot darker and colder than normal. The only light to be seen are the decorated storefronts for Cormas eve, which is only a few days away. Ever since Nadiya and Ana were little their families have been spending Cormas together. Ana doesn’t have much family of her own and as she and Nadiya grew closer as friends, the Francors decided it was only right to invite them. Normally Mr. Francor would spend all of December singing Cormas songs, decorate the house and he would have planned a Cormas movie for every night. When he was young, he never had a good Cormas; there were no trees, no presents and no food. If he were lucky, his dad would drink himself to sleep and he would avoid getting beaten. He was always jealous of all his friends with their families, dinners and presents and after he ran away from home, he swore to make every Cormas the best ever. Ms. Francor tried her best to keep the traditions alive but in the end the thought of having Cormas without Mr. Francor was too much for her. Every single tradition is haunted by a thousand memories, it is like his ghost is haunting Cormas. After a few days she broke down crying and has barely been out of bed all of December. Now Nadiya and Ana is bracing the cold weather on their own and have gone out to shop for the holidays. Nadiya don’t mind doing everything because it almost feels like her dad is still with them.
“My mom says that if we need anything, we can just call her. She has to work most of the holidays but she will be there if we need her” Ana informs as she looks over the shopping list.
“I don’t want to bother your mom. She is working so hard and has so much to do already. She deserves some time to relax. Let’s just keep it simple. We can skip the roast and do chicken instead. It’s cheaper and takes less time to cook” Nadiya suggests. She has always admired Ms. Jamescor and hard she is working as a nurse. It hasn’t always been easy for them but she always managed to work at least forty hours a week, have time to Ana and volunteer down at the soup kitchen. And still she finds time to come by and help out with the house. Nadiya doesn't know how they would have made it through the last couple of months without her help.
Ana sighs as she looks at the Cormas roast in the store’s cooler “it’s just not the same without a roast but you are right we have to be a little more practical this year, chicken will do fine”. She grabs a pack of chicken breasts and puts them in the basket with green beans and potatoes. “Then we just need some rice pudding and we are done… hey is that, Darla?”
They can see a girl through the window forcing her way through the snow on the other side of the street. She looks a lot like Darla, except she is less glamorous than usual; her hair is unwashed and her coat is worn and full of holes. She enters a sleazy bar known for being popular with the local alcoholics.
“It can’t be her; I have never seen Darla so plain and dirty before. And she would never be seen in a place like that; she is a big fashion model who only cares about herself” Nadiya mocks. It makes her sad to say this about their friend but since she started hanging out with Chad, she has become a real bitch towards everybody.
“I’m sure it was her. Let’s go find out what she is doing in that bar” Ana says concerned. Nadiya knows it would be futile to argue about this and agrees.
They pay for their groceries and run across the street to peek through the tinted window to the bar. It is near impossible to see anything but it doesn’t look like Darla is in there. Ana hands the bags to Nadiya and carefully opens the door. With a quick glance over her shoulder, she sneaks inside to have a look around. Nadiya follows her movement from the outside and she is back a moment later.
“I couldn’t see her. Do you think she went somewhere else?” Ana looks around but there is nowhere else she could have gone. Everything else has closed because of the bad weather and approaching holiday.
“Wait, I think I see her. She is coming out of the kitchen carrying a tray of glasses. I think she is working here. Let’s go around to the kitchen door” Nadiya feels a knot growing in her stomach. She had hoped that it was someone else, that it wasn’t their friend. Their beautiful model friend who spent the summer in Sirap and Nalim. But even through this dirty tinted window, she knows that it is her. She knows the way she walks and stands as if they were sisters. It hurts to see her like this. It hurts that she doesn’t know what she is going through or why. She wants to talk with Darla, to let her know that they are still there to help her if she needs it.
They walk around to the back of the building where they can see right into the kitchen. The window is open ajar and they can hear the impatient growling voice of a man who has spent his life drinking and smoking.
“...you can’t stay here during the holidays. This is not a hotel. This is a bar and you are barely old enough to work as my dishwasher. I only agreed to hire you because you work for five dollars an hour. Now go do your job and stop wasting my time”.
“But sir, please. I don’t have anywhere to go. It’s cold outside and the shelter is full” they hear Darla plead.
“Either do your job or leave my bar. I don’t care that you have nowhere to go” the owner yells and the door slams.
The knot in Nadiya’s stomach grows. Darla is poor and homeless. Here she thought that she is living with her parents and has a well-paying model job but she barely has anything. “We should help her, offer her a place to stay” Nadiya whispers, she can see that Ana is also feeling bad about it.
Ana sneaks a peek through the window. Darla is alone in the kitchen standing over the sink and crying into the water. Carefully Ana knocks on the window just hard enough for Darla to hear and then opens it wider.
Shocked, Darla looks up at her former friends poking their heads through the window. “What are you doing here?” she hisses.
“We heard you have no place to go and we want to help. You can stay at my house if you want” Nadiya offers, hoping to bridge the distance in their friendship. She misses hanging out with Darla.
“Why didn’t you say anything? How long have you been homeless?” Ana asks with as much love and care as possible.
For half a second her face lights up before reverting to her newly accustomed bitchy demeanour “well you heard wrong. I’m fine, I have a wonderful life. I don’t need anybody’s help and I don’t need your help. Just because Taial still doesn’t want to be your friend, doesn’t mean I’m going to take you back. Leave me alone” she snaps at them. Before they can interject, she closes the window and walks away.
“Why doesn't she want our help? We were her friends; she could have talked to us” Ana cries as they slowly walk back to the bus stop.
“She has made it clear she doesn’t want to be our friend. She only cares about herself and Chad. Let’s just get home, we have a shift at the hospital in an hour” Nadiya says, trying to sound like she doesn’t care. But she does care and the same questions run through her head. Why doesn’t Darla want their help? What happened between them since she doesn’t trust or confide in them anymore?
They have been volunteering at the hospital for over a year now. They started when Ana turned sixteen and they both were old enough. They wanted to do something that helps people while also getting experience that would look good on their college applications. In the start, Darla was also volunteering together with them until a week into the summer vacation when she stopped showing up. She said it was too hard to be around sick and hurt people all the time. Both Ana and Nadiya have many times thought of quitting for the same reasons but they can’t leave knowing that so many are in need of help. Their workdays often go by with prepping rooms, stocking the storage, helping the patients or assisting the nurses. Today they are assisting at emergency care as it is swarmed with holiday related incidents.
The shift has barely begun when a big muscular biker walks in; he has a very intimidating look and is the kind of man they have always been warned about. He is gently carrying a young man in his arms and his voice is soft when he speaks “we need some help over. I found him bound to a pole down near the beach”.
A nurse immediately comes to help and leads them to an open bed where he places the young man. “Nadiya get me some blankets, we need to warm him up” she commands and Nadiya runs to the supply closet.
Except for a blanket that has been swaddled around him, the young man is completely naked. It is hard to tell his skin colour as it has turned blue from being out in the cold for too long. Both his face and body show signs that he has received a heavy beating by multiple assailants. His face is bloody and his nose is broken. He has a dislocated arm and a broken leg. If it was not stone his heart beating faintly in his chest, you would not think he was alive.
The biker takes a step back from the bed to make room “I don’t know how long he has been bound to the pole; he was unconscious when I find him. I rushed here as fast as I could. Is he going to make it?”
“I know him. His name is Taial, I go to school with him” Nadiya exclaims as she returns with the blankets. Even with the wounds and bruises, there is no doubt in her.
“Good. Thank you. We need more blankets to warm him up and can you bring him a hot cocoa and call his parents” the nurse says as she starts examining the bruises. Taial opens his eyes and she leans in over him to talk “Taial you are at the hospital now and we are going to make you all better. I am Tilda. Can you tell me what happened or who did this to you…”
For the next hour nurse Tilda sits with Taial, cleaning his wounds and trying to get him to talk about what happened but he remains silent, staring empty at the wall across from him. She doesn’t leave his side before his parents arrive and then she only leaves for a moment to explain the situation.
“It was Thor and Chad, wasn’t it?” Ana asks now that there are no one to hear them. He doesn’t have to answer she can see it in his eyes that it was them. “You have to report it. They almost killed you and they will do it again if you don’t report them to the police. You have to do it for your own safety and for everybody else. They are too dangerous. Please report them” she pleads with tears in her eyes.
“I’ll make them pay. I’ll make them regret messing with me” Taial whispers, his voice is angry and hurt and he refuses to spare a single glance at Ana sitting at his side.
“Look at you, your heart has turned to stone. You can’t live like this. If you don’t tell your parents and the nurse, I will” Ana says, frightened by the anger she sees in him. She knows it won’t be the same since she has no proof and she didn’t witness it. But she hopes it will make him talk about it. She will no longer let Thor and Chad intimidate and threaten their way out of trouble.
---
It’s the first week back at school after the holidays and Taial is sitting in the principal’s office waiting. He had to stay in the hospital for three days before he could go home. They told him that he was lucky that there was no permanent damage, except he will be using crotches for a while and his arm is in a sling. Thor and Chad were arrested for the assault on him; he has been told they were arrested on Cormas eve during the dinner. He didn’t want to press charges but Ana kept to her word and told his parents everything that had happened at school, so his mom and dad forced him to do it. However, it does bring him a little satisfaction thinking about how they were arrested. Unfortunately, it most likely won’t stick, that is what the police told him. Both of them comes from prominent families and there is no evidence, no witnesses or surveillance.
“Taial, good to see you back on your feet. How are you doing?” principal Martincor greets as he steps into the office. “I have asked you to come here today, because of the incident over Cormas break. I was sad to hear about it. It is horrible what those boys did to you. You are a great student, very bright and the teachers only have good things to say about you. I would love to tell that it will be better now, unfortunately, I only bring bad news. Thor’s dad, the big lawyer, has managed to get all charges dropped and Thor and Chad will be released next week. I tried to use the arrest to expel the boys from school but he threatened to sue the school and me if I did. Therefore, they will be returning to school soon. I am very sorry but there is nothing I can do unless they are caught violating the rules again. However, we will be hiring more hall monitors and have cameras installed to hopefully make the school a little safer. It is not much but it’s a start. You will also have to start in an anger management class; it is every Monday after school, starting from today”.
Taial listens to the words that is being said and he can’t believe it. Thor and Chad released just like that and now he has to take anger management classes. How is this even fair? Why is he the one who gets punished? He was the victim. He wants to yell and smash the table but he restrains himself. His mother always taught him to respect his superiors. “Is that all?” he asks and leaves without waiting for an answer.
“Hey Taial, are you back already? How are you doing?” Ana asks concerned and interested as she sees him walk down the hallway.
“Fuck off Ana. I told you to stay away from me” he yells. He knows that she only wants to help but every time she tried, his life only got worse. The party at the beach, protecting him in the hallways, telling his mom, everything she has done to help has only led to Thor and Chad hating him more. Now they will be back next week and his life will be hell. He wishes something bad would happen to them so he could finally be free from their torment.
At the end of the day, he walks through the door to the classroom to his anger management class. There are about twenty students in here, all looking displeased and annoyed. He recognises several of the faces from around the school, victims of bullying, victims of violence, victims of Thor, Chad and even Darla. He doesn’t greet them or anything, he just sits down at the first free table. A female teacher arrives five minutes later.
“Hello class and thank you for coming. I’m Ms. Taylcor, your teacher in anger management…” she starts introducing.
“This is bullshit” Taial exclaims abruptly. He didn’t mean to interrupt the teacher; the words just flew out of him filled with his grievance. He has been thinking about this class all day and has hardly been able to focus on anything else. “Why are we here? We are the ones who gets bullied and beaten. So why are we the ones who gets punished with this class?”
“He’s right, this is total bullshit. Thor and Chad go around beating up people and we are supposed to control our anger. Fuck this shit. Fuck this school” a dark-haired boy joins in.
“I understand how you feel and I know that it may not feel like it right now but this is actually good for you” Ms. Taylcor says in a calm tone. “Okay, let’s start like this. Everybody please show your heart to each other. I know it’s a bit transgressive but please trust me” Ms. Taylcor uncovers her own heart first, showing a flesh heart with patches of stone.
Taial looks around to the others, he doesn’t want to show his heart, especially not to strangers. And the others looks like they feel the same.
“Come on, please” Ms. Taylcor says still with her calm voice.
A big girl, Taial only knows her as Fatty Splatty, is the first to uncover her heart; it is made of solid black stone. He can’t help but feel a little impressed by how brave she is but he also feels very sad by the sight of her heart. A person with a hard like that she must have endured a lot of pain. “I am Jill but everybody calls me Fatty Splatty. I have been called Fatty Splatty since third grade after I fell in gym class and Thor thought it looked like I was splatting out on the floor” she says, her voice is angry but her eyes are full of pain.
“Very good Jill. I am proud of you” Ms. Taylcor says supportive.
The others stare awkwardly at Jill, unsure about how to react. Taial can see that attention is starting to make her uncomfortable, that she is starting to regret showing her heart. He feels sad for her and stands up to draw the attention away from her. He quickly reveals his own heart made of light grey stone. For ten years he has kept his heart hidden from the world and now within a matter of weeks he has shown it to more people than ever before. He always thought that the first time he would willing reveal his heart to someone, it would be to a girl he really loved. “I am Taial. I transferred here from Natsikap at the start of the school year and have been bullied and beaten by Thor and Chad ever since. At Cormas I almost died because of them; they tied me naked to a pole outside in the cold and beat me. I was saved by a friendly biker who brought me to the hospital. I got them arrested for assault but today principal Martincor told me that the charges against them have been dropped and they will return to school next week”. His words ignite an outburst of angry comments, uniting them around a common enemy. Slowly the others follow and reveals their hearts, some introduces themselves while others just stay silent.
“As you can see, we all have hearts that have turned into stone. That is why you are here in this class instead of Thor and Chad. Their hearts are very likely still flesh. They aren’t full of anger, hatred and pain but they are out there causing it. But all of you, your anger has turned your hearts to stone and it will ruin your lives if you don’t manage to control it. My heart was once made of stone too. In college, I was raped and nobody believed me. When I accused my attacker, he told everybody that I was a psycho stalker who was obsessed with him and wouldn’t accept that he had a girlfriend. I got known as the crazy bitch and had to drop out. I lived in constant fear that he might do it again and I was always angry because nobody believed me. I started drinking to deal with my anger and to hide my pain but eventually it got out of control and led me down a path of violence. I began attacking every single person who looked at me slightly wrong, fearing they might do something to me. It got so bad that I ended up breaking into his house and I almost killed him in his sleep. I stood at his bed with a knife my hand ready to plunge it into his heart over and over again. Then I heard his three-year-old daughter crying in the next room and I froze. He was a monster but I couldn’t do that to a little girl. I sought help to process my trauma and slowly after a long time, my heart turned back to flesh. However, it will never truly go back as it were. Once our hearts have turned black or turned to stone, they will carry traces of it until we die. It becomes part of who we are and we can never truly let it go”.
“What happened to your rapist? Did he just get away with everything?” Kayle, a shorthaired punk girl who has wrapped steel wire around her stone heart, asks.
“No, that shit stain is in jail now. Turned out he tried raping another woman but she fought back and dragged him to the police station with enough evidence to get him arrested” Ms. Taylcor smiles. The fact that Ms. Taylcor has been through all of that and that she knows their pain, has changed his mind about the class.
“What do you think of this class?” Atticus, the dark-haired boy, asks as they leave school. Except for agreeing with Taial in the start, he didn’t participate at all.
“I understand why they are making us take this class but it won’t solve our problems. It won’t protect us from Thor and Chad. They will still be back next week and they will still be the same violent Neanderthals with rich douchy parents to bail them out of everything. I wish we could make them pay somehow” Taial answers honestly.
Atticus smiles “don’t worry, I have a plan”. Something about him makes Taial uneasy and he doesn’t want to spend time with him. Not even if he actually has a plan to deal with Thor and Chad. Taial just nods and leaves without saying anything else.
---
“Have you found a dress for prom yet? There’s only a week left” Nadiya asks Ana over lunch in the cantina. Spring has finally arrived and released them from cold, dark and depressing grasp.
Prom is the first thing in a long time that has brought any kind of real joy to Ana. She has dreamed of prom since she was a little girl. The big ball, the theme, the balloon arches and all the beautiful dresses, all the high school movies has always made it look fantastical. She pulls out a polaroid picture from her backpack “yes, I found a blue one at the thrift store yesterday. Look how pretty it is”. It is a big puffy and elegant in royal blue, decorated delicately with rhine stones around the neckline and down around her heart and it comes with matching gloves.
A boy walks by and snatches the picture out of Ana’s hands “how pretty. So, you are going to prom? Who are you going with?”
Ana stands up and takes her picture back “I’m not going with anyone Kyle. Nadiya and I don’t need a date in order to go to prom”.
“You are both going alone. Only losers go alone to prom” Kyle laughs obnoxiously.
Unbothered by Kyle’s remark Ana sits down with Nadiya again “why should we miss out on the biggest dance just because we don’t have dates. We don’t need boys to have a fun evening”.
“Yeah, well that’s what the ugly ones always say…” a couple of loud bangs followed by screams interrupts Kyle.
They turn their heads to the door wondering what happened and a moment later the doors fly open. A large flock of students run through the cantina screaming in fear. Confused they look at the small crowd, shoving and pushing their way forward. More loud bangs echo in the hallway and a single person covered in black clothing with only his stone heart exposed walks through the door. He has a gun in his hand and is pointing it around in the cantina shooting carelessly at people. Suddenly it makes sense why everyone is running, Nadiya and Ana falls backwards off the bench and clumsily gets up to follow the others out of the cantina. Kyle is already long gone, forcing his way through the crowd. The hallway splits three ways and so does the crowd. Panic and fear increase with every shot that sounds. An alarm starts blaring over the com-system warning them about danger. They run down a hallway clutching each other’s hand. They don’t know where they are going, they just run as fast as they can. They have to get away but no matter where they turn, they meet students coming from all directions, crossing their path. Ana and Nadiya turn a corner and find themselves all alone in an empty hallway. Except the hallway isn’t empty at all. Somebody is lying on the floor a little further down.
“Hey, are you okay?” Ana asks as she runs to the person on the floor. She has barely reached the spot when she slips in a pool of blood. It’s a young boy, a freshman, lying on the floor, pale. He isn’t moving at all. She knows he is dead but still she desperately checks his pulse and breathing, hoping she’s wrong. “Are you okay?” she asks again, her voice breaks as she keeps checking on him.
More shots are fired. The sound echoes down the hallway, deafening. The shooter is close by.
Nadiya grabs Ana’s hand “he’s dead. We have to go” she yells with tears in her eyes. This boy was so young, killed in his first year of high school.
“Run! They are coming. Run!” they can hear someone yell as a group of students turns down hallway and runs towards them.
A different masked person covered in black clothing turns the corner with a gun raised, shooting and laughing. This shooter is a lot taller than the first one with a stone heart that is completely black. A girl falls forward and lies still on the floor, a clean hit in the back. Nadiya pulls Ana up from the floor and they start running again. Stones and dust flies into the air as the bullets hits the wall just as they turn the corner. Together with the others they continue down the hallway to an intersection. A boy with blood all over his clothes crosses their path. Shots echoes from all directions. They don’t know where to run to. Nadiya looks back and sees the shooter turn the corner, right behind them. She pulls Ana in the same direction as the boy but she doesn’t move.
“Darla” Ana gasps and points down the hallway where the boy came from past a group of students running towards them.
Darla is running hand in hand with Chad but she can barely keep up. She is breathing heavily and it looks like she has twisted her ankle. She falls flap on the ground as someone bumps into her trying to get away. Chad stops for a second, looking at Darla lying on the ground before he sets off in a sprint following the group away from there. Nadiya and Ana turn around without a moment of hesitation and run against the crowd to help Darla.
“Are you okay?” Nadiya asks as they each grab an arm to help her up.
“I can’t run anymore. Just leave me. No one wants me anyway” Darla sulks, lying on the floor.
Several shot sounds and the group of students they just passed turns around and runs back towards them. They lift Darla and start walking as fast as they can, supporting her between them, determined not to leave her behind. They can’t run like this. They need to find a place to hide.
Darla collapses in pain, screaming, with a hand on her stomach after they turn a corner “leave me. Save yourselves”.
“We are not leaving you to die. Let’s try the toilettes” Nadiya whispers and they drag Darla to the nearest bathroom. There is no lock on the door; it was removed last year to prevent students from being locked inside by bullies. They desperately place the trashcan against the door, knowing well that it won’t keep anybody out. Scared, they huddle up on the floor in the handicap stall.
“You should have left me. I have been a bitch all year. I don’t deserve to live and you shouldn’t die because of me. I’m the worst friend ever…” Darla cries.
“Shush, be quiet” Nadiya whispers and covers both of their mouths as the bathroom door opens and the trashcan falls over with a loud thump. It feels like her heart has stopped beating. She stares at the stall door holding her breath, she forgot to lock it. It feels like an eternity as she stares at the handle to the stall, trying to listen to the footsteps that slowly comes closer. She wonders if she should dare get up and lock it. This is how they are going to die. Her thoughts wander to her dad in the towers. Did he wait around for death to find him as well or did he die instantly? Was he scared and alone? Will she be seeing him soon? And what about her mom, how will she ever go on? Tears run down her face as she kisses Darla and Ana on the forehead. If this is the end, at least she is with her best friends. She just wishes that she and Darla had had a better year together. The handle moves and the stall door opens. “Please don’t kill us” she gasps in panic.
A small mousy girl stands outside the stall, screaming. She covers her mouth and falls to her knees crying.
Nadiya lets go of the others and quickly embraces the girl “shh, it’s okay” she whispers and locks the stall door behind them, hoping that nobody heard the girl’s scream. “Are you alone? Did you see the shooter?”
Barely has she asked the question before the bathroom doors open again, this time more aggressively. It slams into the trashcan with a loud bump. The stall doors are kicked open one by one. Whoever is outside has reached the last stall. They kick on the stall door but it doesn’t open. Another kick lands and the door stays shut. The person outside starts hammering and banging frustrated on the door. The four girls are moving further back from the door, holding on to each other. The lock is holding. Then silence. Their eyes are glued to the door. They dare not say anything. The lock explodes with a loud bang. The four girls scream as the smaller shooter enters the stall with a gun pointing right at them. The stone heart is slowly beating with hatred.
“Any last words?” an angry male voice asks from under the mask.
“Why are you doing this?” Nadiya cries, trying to cover for the others. She doesn’t mind sacrificing herself if it means the others will live. If it means Ana will live.
“Why? WHY?” he spits, the question clearly angers him. “Because you deserve it, that’s why! You are all self-absorbed evil bitches, who will screw over any good guy for your own gain. Every day, good guys like me are beaten, bullied and mistreated and dicks like Thor and Chad are applauded for it”.
“We don’t know you” Ana protests. She doesn’t recognise his voice and there are more than a thousand people in this school. It is unrealistic to expect her to pay attention to every single person she meets.
The shooter slaps Ana with his gun “you don’t know me? Well, I know you. The two good girls who didn’t care at all about who Thor and Chad bullied until that foreigner started here. You must have seen me get beaten at least fifty times the last four years and never did you do anything to help. But he gets beaten up once and you throw yourself at him like common whores. And you, the queen bitch, the big model, you have always ignored me. I treated you nice, I helped you out with chemistry, I gave you concert tickets, I let you borrow copied notes for you when you were sick. I wanted to take you on dates and make you my girlfriend but you never had time for me, always blowing me off with a lame excuse like, you didn’t want a boyfriend. And then you started going out with that dick, Chad, who never treated you nice and always cheated on you with every girl he could he get his hands on”. He pushes his gun against Darla’s head “you are going to die first”.
Crying Darla throws herself at his feet with her hands raised above her head “no! Please don’t kill me. I’m with heart” she begs and holds out a small scratched up mat glass heart. By the size of it, she is six months along.
“I DON’T CARE YOU FUCKING SLUT” he yells and throws the glass heart on the ground, shattering it in a million pieces “YOU DON’T DESERVE A CHILD. YOU DON’T DESERVE HAPPINESS. ALL YOU DESERVE IS PAIN”. He kicks Darla in the face and gets ready to shoot but Ana jumps at him, trying to stop him. The gun goes off and Ana falls to the ground in front of him.
“ANA” Nadiya throws herself over Ana. She grabs her face and turn it around. She’s gasping for air with tears running down her cheeks. “No. Stay with me. Stay with me. You're going to be okay” she stammers, trying to comfort her. The shooter pushes her away and takes aim again. Nadiya closes her eyes and braces for the shot.
“Hey!”
The bathroom door slams shut followed by a loud bang. Nadiya opens her eyes just in time to see Taial tackle the shooter. He slams the shooter’s head into the wall and a moment later, they both drop to the ground unconscious. Nadiya grabs the gun and throws it to the other end of the bathroom before returning to Ana who has stopped breathing. “Come on, stay with me. Come on baby, stay with me. Darla check on Taial! You get some help” Nadiya yells while doing chest compressions on Ana. But Darla isn’t listening; with a manic look she is frantically trying to pick up the small glass pieces and put them back together.
“Come on, you can’t die. I need you. You can’t leave me. Do something” Nadiya yells. They need help.
The girl crawls over to Taial, her entire body is shaking wildly “there’s… there’s… blood. A lot of blood” she lifts her blood-soaked hands and shows them to Nadiya.
“Stay with me, it’s going to be okay. What’s your name?” Nadiya asks the girl. They don’t have any time to waste, she needs her to listen.
“Ma-Ma-Marielle” the girl stammer.
“Good. Marielle, you need to put pressure on the wound. Place your hand on the wound, push down, and just keep your hands there. HELP US. WE NEED HELP IN HERE” Nadiya yells hoping that someone can hear her. The alarm is still blaring drowning out her screams.
---
“It is with a heavy heart that I welcome you all to this assembly…” principal Pat Martincor is standing in the assembly hall in front of the students, their parents and local news reporters. He looks thinner and more worn down than ever, this year has taken its toll on his physical health. It has been a month since the shooting. He has postponed this assembly as long as he could, he wanted to give time to mourn and grieve. “High school is a hard time for our kids to go through; their bodies changes, they are trying to find their own way and figure out who they are, they experience heartbreaks, there are bullies and an enormous academic pressure that will decide their futures. Life in high school is hard and unfortunately, this year has been tremendously worse for everybody. First, we experienced a terrible attack on our nation in September and now this. Last month two armed students entered our school where they murdered thirteen and injured twenty-one of our friends and colleagues. If it hadn’t been for some brave souls, who risked their lives to save and protect us it might have turned out much worse. It is a terrible situation that never should have happened and I am sorry to say that we were not prepared for it. As teachers and your principal, it is our job to educate and guide your children and to keep them save from danger. However, we have failed you. I have failed you all. I am sorry that this has happened and therefore, I will at the end of the year step down as principal. In just a moment, we will have a minute of silence to honour and remember those we lost. Kylie, Thor, Graham, Janos, Grace, Taial, Kyle, Hodge, Ellie, Jessica, Gabriel, Thai and Annie. You have been taken from us far too soon and we will always remember you in our hearts. Farewell our friends and may you find peace” he steps away from the microphone and the entire assembly hall falls completely silent. He took this job five years ago because he wanted to help guide the students through this difficult time of their life but he no longer feels like he is worthy of this role. He has failed them all.
As the minute of silence ends Ana walks up on the stage to the microphone. She is wearing a white dress with a glass cover that magnifies her heart; it has turned a very dark red, almost black. She was released from the hospital two weeks ago and has been hiding at home with Nadiya. She wasn’t going to show up but Principal Martincor has asked her and some of the other students to share their stories. However, she is not going to talk about herself, she is going to talk about Taial. If it hadn’t been for him, she would have died in that bathroom, she owes him everything and wishes she could have done more for him throughout the year. “Last year, Taial Singhcor and his family moved from Natsikap to Acirema in hope of finding a better life. He transferred to our school for his last year of high school as a happy kid, eager to learn and find new friends. He dreamed of getting an education and a job so he could provide for his family. But, because his skin was green instead of purple or red, he was met with hostility and hatred from almost everyone. Every day he was bullied and beaten because he was a little different. And when the towers of Kroy Wen were attacked, the bullying only became worse. Because a small group of Vertocors, who shared his skin colour, did something horrible, students at this school found it acceptable to make his life a living nightmare. It became so bad that he was almost killed over Cormas; his bullies beat him up, tied him naked to a pole out in the cold and left him to die. If it hadn’t been for one good man, Taial would have died just before Cormas. In the few months from school start to Cormas eve, his heart turned to stone. He experienced so much hatred and got filled with anger, yet he never hesitated to do the right thing. He was a good man, a true hero. During the shooting, he found a group of girls with a gun to their heads, just seconds away from being shot and without hesitation he threw himself at the shooter. He sacrificed his life to save four girls from dying. He never let anything take away that he was a good person” she pauses to wipe her eyes. It is hard to talk about. Just thinking about everything Taial went through is breaking her heart all over again. “We should all try to be more like Taial. We need to treat each other better no matter where we come from or who we are. We should strive to be better and never let hatred win. I thank you Taial. You will always be in my heart”. She leaves the stage and a tall boy she doesn’t know walks up to the microphone to share his story.
“That was a beautiful speech” Nadiya is standing at the side of the stage waiting for Ana. She is fully crying and embraces her as she steps down from the stage. Her heart is now fully flesh, the last piece of glass disappeared when the medics announced Taial dead on the bathroom floor. If they had been found just a few seconds later, Ana would have been gone too. “Do you want to get out of here?” She finds it very painful to be near the school right now. Ana nods and after a few hugs and words of gratitude from Taial’s family they walk out to the school parking lot, that is more packed with cars than normal.
“Please wait” Darla calls, running after them. They haven’t seen her since the hospital, she left without saying a word. She is no longer dressed in her usual expensive clothes nor wearing makeup. Instead, she is looking as worn down and tired as she did the day, they saw her at the bar. Her heart is showing, it is dark with patches of stone, very unlike the heart she has showed the entire year. “I want to apologise. I’m sorry for how I treated you, I have been a real bitch this year” she barely manages to get the sentence out before breaking down. “I’m not a model; I never went to Nalim or Sirap. I lied… I have been homeless since the start of last summer… Mom left in the middle of the night and the next day dad threw me out of the house. He said he never wanted a child… Chad found out and helped me; he lent me his sister's clothes, her car and some nights when he was home alone, he let me stay with him. I wanted to tell you but I didn’t know how. I was ashamed and scared that I might lose you too. Then we went to the mall and you left with Taial, it felt like you were leaving me, just like my parents… It felt like the only one I could count on was Chad. I got so angry with you and you didn’t deserve it. I got angry with everyone, I let Chad treat me like shit because I felt like shit and I took it out on everyone… At Cormas when you offered me help, I wanted to take it. I wanted to tell you everything but I felt like I didn’t deserve your help. I had just learned I was pregnant and I felt like a loser and a disappointment. I didn’t trust that you wouldn’t leave me again… I know now that I was wrong. You were the only one who were there for me; you saved me and protected me when Chad left me to die. Now my life is ruined, my future is ruined. I have no money, I have no job, I have no home and I lost my baby…” she falls to her knees crying uncontrollably.
Nadiya and Ana sit down on each side of her, taking her hands in theirs and hold her tight. They feel sad for her, they never imagined that her life had become so bad. “You can always count on us. We are here for you and if you need a place to stay, you can come stay with me for as long as you need. My mom always has room for you. You may have been a bitch, but you are not worthless. You are a wonderful, smart and beautiful woman who can do anything you want” Nadiya says as they sit between the cars under the sun.
With everything that has happened this year, they no longer feel like the same girls. All their hopes and plans for the future seems like foolish dreams of a child. Nothing in the world could have prepared them for this and they don’t know how to go on. A few moments have changed their lives forever.
Comments
Post a Comment